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The Issues around the Phrase Work/Life Balance

By: Robin Hills

One of the most impactful insights that I have had is how damaging the phrase “work/life balance” is. 

Misconceptions around work/life balance can develop false beliefs about what is required of them and set high standards for themselves, which can result in feelings of disappointment and low morale when these are not realised. 

The issue with the phrase “work/life balance” is that it compartmentalises everything into work activities – meetings, clients, trips, conferences – and life activities – family, commitments, holidays, hobbies, keeping healthy.

Think about it for a moment, the phrase is actually meaningless!  Life is not at one end of fulcrum with work on the other end.  Work is an integrated part of life.

Jeff Bezos, the CEO of Amazon, refers to the term work/life balance as a debilitating phrase and advises considering personal and professional pursuits as a circle rather than a balancing act.  He considers the concept as more work/life harmony, where work and life are integrated, instead of a trade-off between the two options.

You only have one life, you just happen to live some of it while working and some of it engaged in other activities. Like most people over the age of 20, work takes up a major proportion of your life and it has to be realistically integrated into all of your activities to give you a rich rewarding and meaningful focus.

Balance is what you make of it.  In truth, there is no actual balance between your work and home life – and that’s because pretty much nobody lives their life in a silo. Life ebbs and flows, and whatever you do, and however hard you try, there will be times when work creeps into your home life and vice versa.  

Whether it’s scheduling a meeting or checking your work email in the evening, taking a call at the weekend or booking a personal appointment at your desk – overlap is impossible to avoid. Also, you are likely to nearly always be thinking about work in some way as it is difficult to leave work issues behind when you leave a physical workspace.

Acknowledging that priorities intermingle is key to understanding the complexity of your life, and by being present in whatever you are doing at the moment will help you gain real balance. 

So, when you are at work, be present.  If you have an emergency that arises at home to deal with, make that call. When you are on holiday, enjoy it.  But if you need to contact your team, allocate time to deal with any issues – and then get back to enjoying your vacation. 

Work/life balance misconceptions create unhealthy, unachievable expectations. Achieving work-life balance, or harmony, or whatever you want to call it, is really about accepting that it is a myth. 

Understanding this will help you bypass undue stress and mental health issues, allowing you instead to operate from a calmer, recalibrated position. So, aiming for work/life harmony means that by seeing it as a whole, you will become more energised at work and more relaxed when at home. 

 

7 Ways To Resolve ANY Conflict

Pragito Dove

7 Ways To Resolve ANY Conflict

Many of us dread conflict. We wish we could all just get along. 

Life, however, has other ideas for us. Everyone is here to be there true selves, have their own opinions, likes, dislikes etc. How boring things would be if we all agreed on everything all the time. Where would our creativity be needed? 

The exciting thing about conflict is that it forces us to expand into a greater creative expression of ourselves. Every time I have found the courage to call someone to task and have a discussion about our conflicting opinions, good things have happened. It doesn’t mean I always get my way, but I do put myself in a position to express my opinion, speak my truth, and listen to their side. Then I have a CHOICE: find an agreement, or walk away from the relationship/situation. And, importantly, I feel good about myself, that I have made every effort to find a resolution. 

If we don’t speak up, we are sitting on an energy of resentment, fear, or frustration  which can lead, later on, to unconscious expressions of that same energy which will probably not have good outcomes.

Conflict is not inevitable. Conflicts are created by people and people can choose to end them. This cannot happen if the parties are set on victory instead of compromise; or, while they prioritize self-centered interest over the highest good of everyone concerned.

When the willingness to be available for discussion exists, there is no conflict that cannot be resolved.

If conflict is rooted in an ‘us’ and ‘them’, or ‘me’ and ‘you’, approach, then peace-building is precisely the opposite. We have to get past the adversarial mind-set, and involve everyone concerned in addressing the common challenges, listening to other points of view, and seeing where we can meet, with an emphasis on what we DO agree on, and not on what we don’t agree on.

When the focus is on what we all want, and not on what we don’t want, there is a higher possibility of success.

 

Our personal histories are all, in one way or another, shaped by the legacies of conflict. But as profound and deep-rooted as our differences may be, it is in our power to redefine those legacies, and, in so doing,  redefine ourselves. Wherever we live in the world, we must recognize that ‘peace’ is not something you can win; it is something that has to be built and shared.

Here are 7 suggestions for conflict resolution:

• Start with the points you all  agree on. This sets a positive foundation of agreement to build upon.
• Can you all agree that the outcome you want is for the highest good of everyone concerned?
• Are you willing, if necessary, to set  aside your personal interests for the highest good of everyone concerned?
• Can you allow yourself to admit you are wrong?  And/or admit that you hadn’t seen the situation from the other person’s point of view?
• Are you speaking from wisdom or from self-centered ego?
• Do you want to be right, or be happy?
• Before starting a conflict resolution do one of the following meditations, either alone or with the other people, to  release tensions and emotional charge, and to help bring your wisest self to the table. The more you are at peace within yourself, the more likely you are to manifest a positive outcome.

 

Setting an Intention Meditation – Two Minutes

Set the intention that you want the outcome of your discussion to be for the highest good of everyone concerned. Sit silently, eyes closed, relaxing into acceptance of what is, with compassion for yourself and everyone involved.

Reproduced with permission from Pragito Dove www.discovermeditation.com

Can Mental Programming Help You Lose Weight?

 

By Judi Moreo

Weight loss is a common goal for men and women. With the numbers of obese people rising, particularly in Western countries, dieting programs and weight loss books and products are becoming increasingly popular.  There are over one billion obese adults in the world. Obesity is known to cause a range of health problems from high blood pressure to Type 2 diabetes.

 

Traditional diets and diet programs can help with weight loss but sadly the majority of those who lose weight on diets either regain the weight or simply give up before achieving their target. The latest studies into weight loss suggest that one key component that is often overlooked is mind-set. Your attitude is a crucial component to the successful outcome of any diet plan you choose to follow.

 

Mental programming can play an invaluable role in weight loss and subsequent weight maintenance once you have achieved your goal.

 

To maximise the effectiveness of your weight loss program you can use more than one mental programming method.

 

Affirmations used daily will focus your mind on your goals and strengthen your belief in your ability to achieve them. Make sure you display them around the kitchen… on your fridge, freezer and food cupboards.

 

A vision board can be really helpful for weight loss. Add pictures of what your life will look like as a slimmer, healthier you. Include outfits you would like to wear. You could add images of treats (not food) you will give yourself as you lose weight. Will you treat yourself to a dream holiday? Add that in. You can also include affirmations.

 

Creative visualization is another powerful method for programming your mind for weight loss success. This is because it involves you imagining the change you want to make and putting yourself in the picture and living in it. It is like imagining yourself stepping into a movie of your future life as a slimmer and healthier version of you.

 

Instead of opting for invasive surgical procedures such as gastric band surgery, you caan opt for the installation of a virtual (hypnotic gastric band). This form of mental programming is undertaken through hypnosis. It requires commitment and listening to hypnosis recordings on a regular basis before and after the virtual surgery to ensure the mental programming stays in place and is effective.

 

A weight loss coach is another alternative. The coach will help you create a suitable goal, outline a plan, identify any possible pitfalls and help you create the correct mind-set to achieve weight loss at a healthy rate. They will help you remain motivated and accountable.

 

Mental programming is an effective method for helping with weight loss provided you are determined to lose weight and committed to making changes in your diet, lifestyle and attitude.

Judi Moreo is one of the most recognized personal growth trainers and coaches in the world. She is the author of 24 books including 2 international bestsellers, “You Are More Than Enough” and “Ignite the Spark.”  As a personal achievement coach, hypnotherapist, and NLP practitioner, Judi will help you discover that you really are More Than Enough to achieve the success you desire.  She has informed, inspired, challenged, motivated and entertained audiences in twenty-nine countries around the globe.   Judi has received many awards including the Woman of Achievement, Entrepreneur; the Nevada Business Person of the Year; has been inducted into the Business Hall of Fame; and in 2020, received a HerStory Award from the Women’s Federation for World Peace. To contact Judi Moreo, judi@judimoreo.com or 702-283-4567.

A Fresh Start for 2023 

By:Aimmee Kodachian.

A new year brings with it fresh starts. It is an opportunity to reflect on the past and rewrite your story in the coming months. No matter what happened in the past year, you can make 2023 your own by setting achievable goals and making a plan to reach them. Let’s take a look at why starting anew this year is important and how to go about doing it. 

Why Starting Fresh Matters 

Each beginning of the new year is a great chance to look back on all your amazing achievements from last year. Think about what you want to do completely different this time around and how these changes can bring out even greater potential in yourself! It’s an opportunity to reset, recharge, and refocus so that you can start fresh with an open mind and heart. That way, you can create realistic goals that are tailored specifically to you.

Making Changes That Stick 

If you want your new plans to become a reality, the key is creating an actionable strategy that will keep you focused and motivated. Get ahead of the game by breaking down each goal into smaller steps – this way it’s easier to stay on track with what needs done in order for success! Additionally, having specific plans also makes it easier to track your progress over time so that you can see just how far you have come! 

Set yourself up for success by forming healthy habits like eating right, exercising regularly or taking time out of every day for some self-care activities like yoga or meditation if those suit your needs best. You should also aim at removing distractions from your life such as social media apps or video games which might be preventing you from staying focused on reaching your goals; this could mean deleting these apps altogether or simply limiting the amount of time spent on them each day/week/month etcetera. Lastly, surround yourself with people who encourage growth in order for them motivate and support when needed along the journey towards achieving your desired outcomes!  

Starting fresh with new year is essential for growth – both mentally and emotionally – allowing us all to feel renewed when approaching our endeavors with vigor and enthusiasm going forward! We must never forget, however, that developing strong habits such as setting achievable goals and creating actionable plans are critical components in order for us to stay focused on our desired outcomes while also remaining aware of distractions along the way that may prevent us from succeeding entirely! With these tips in mind, let’s make this year the best one yet!

Music Can Heal

By: Stephanie Thompson

Have you ever watched a movie with the sound off and then rewatched the same scene with the soundtrack playing? It’s a marked difference. Or how about have you ever driven on the freeway with no music playing, stuck in traffic, and felt your blood start to boil, but then decide to play some uplifting music and start to calm down and feel the shift in your emotions? There is no denying music’s effect on us.

 

According to Music4life.com, as early as 323-373 BCE, Aristotle wrote that “flute

music could arouse strong emotions and purify the soul.” There is

proof everywhere that the medical community takes the healing of music

seriously in the evidence of the abundance of music therapy programs

offered and the significant programs in places like John Hopkins Center

for Music and Medicine where they provide money, research, and support in

the studies of music and healing.

 

In an article from “Harvard’s Health Watch,” the author cites how “music can ease anxiety and discomfort during invasive procedures, for example in controlled clinical trials of people having colonoscopies, cardiac angiography, and knee surgery, those who listened to music before their procedure had reduced anxiety and a reduced need for sedatives.”

 

Robin Spielberg, pianist, composer, and author, in her Tedx Talk, “The Healing Power of Music,” tells how when her premature baby was in the Neo-natal Intensive Care Unit, Robin played a CD of her piano music and the vital signs of her daughter and every infant within earshot improved. She also recounts how post-WW2, nurses noticed how veterans recovered quicker and got up on their feet faster when hearing big band music. One of the most profound experiences that she talks about is when she goes to play at a nursing home. She walks in and the patients there look depressed and she starts to play piano and no one really responds to her performance so she proceeds to play and finish out her set and heads out of the building. But, then a nurse runs up to her and tells her how one of the gentlemen listenings sang along with her on “Moon River.” The nurse tearfully went on to tell her that in the past six months after his wife died, he hadn’t talked to anyone including his family and that her performance had broken through to him and now he was willing to talk to his family again. In her own words, Spielberg tells how that was her most successful performance and she played at Carnegie Hall. I had a very similar experience in my singing career. I was presenting a concert to this retirement home as some volunteer work I used to do and it was a Memorial Day concert so I was singing patriotic songs. After my performance, I was walking around saying hello to the residents and one of the nurses came up to me with tears in her eyes. She told me how one of the gentlemen at her table had never spoken since he’d been there but today when I sang, he sang along out loud with me. I, like Robin, remember feeling very touched and moved by this and that’s when I really started to understand the healing power of music.

 

If you enjoyed this article, please check out my other articles and see how music can heal. I also do Facebook Lives on Thursday nights at 7 pm to share tips about singing.

Enjoy your music. ❤️

Why the Terms “Negative Emotions” and “Positive Emotions” are Misleading

By: Robin Hills

“Negative emotions” and “Positive Emotions” are terms that are widely used.  Indeed, they are often used by psychologists and people working in the field of emotional intelligence from time to time.

Emotion is complex state of feeling resulting in physical and physiological changes that influence our thoughts and our behaviour.

Emotions are controlled through interactions within the amygdala and hippocampal complex, which are parts of the limbic system within our brains. This part of the brain is often referred to as the emotional brain. It has no language processing capabilities. It’s the neocortex – the thinking parts of our brain – that assigns a label to the emotion.

Emotions have developed over the centuries – over eons – through evolutionary processes as a survival mechanism. They serve us well as long as we work with them effectively.

Emotions are emotions. We experience them for a reason, and they contain vital information. We can’t really put a judgment on emotion as to whether they’re “positive” or “good”, or whether they’re “negative” or bad.

It’s not the emotion that’s positive or negative, it’s the thought process and the behaviours that they provoke that requires the label. An emotion leads us to behave in a certain way. If it leads us to behave in a way that causes annoyance and upset to others, then that is the important thing we should focus on as being positive or negative.

Happiness is often referred to as a “positive emotion”. It suggests a state that we should all aspire towards all the time, but it’s not an appropriate emotion to show at a solemn occasion such as a funeral.

Also, happiness will limit us in our ability to communicate effectively, to negotiate well and to make critical decisions

So-called “negative emotions”, such as anger, sadness or fear, have physiological effects and can be used in positive ways. We experience them for a reason.

Anger can be used in a positive way to right a wrong and to overcome an injustice, and we can use it to stop something bad from happening to other people. Anger also makes us more attentive and careful in our thinking and drives us to motivate us at certain times.

Sadness is experienced as a part of bereavement. This is an emotion that can be expressed positively at solemn occasions. It allows us the chance to come to terms with our loss, to be thankful and then to move on.

Fear is often termed a “negative emotion”, but it stops us from taking unnecessary risks such as walking across a busy road without looking. Also, if fear is such a negative emotion why do we get so much pleasure from horror films and scary movies?

So, the important thing to remember is not to label emotions as “positive” or “negative”, but to look to focus on the behaviour and the outcome of that emotion and look at those as being positive or negative.

The way that you use your emotions drives the way that you act or make decisions and drives your emotional intelligence.

 

 

How To Unleash Your Creativity

By: Pragito Dove

What is creativity? Are your conditioned ideas keeping you in a box? How can you find out where your creativity lies?

Creativity has nothing to do with any activity in particular – with painting, poetry, dancing, singing. Activity itself is neither creative or uncreative. You can paint, or sing, in an uncreative way. You can cook, or clean the floor in a creative way. Creativity is the quality you bring to whatever activity you are doing; it is an attitude, an inner approach, how you perceive things.

Your creativity is already inside you, waiting to be unleashed. If you are feeling blocked then do whatever brings you joy. It doesn’t matter what you do, do it joyfully, lovingly, with totality, and not purely out of economic motives. Be fully present and you will feel something spiritual, creative, divine, arising out of you. Love what you do regardless of what it is. If you clean the floor with love, you have done an invisible painting. You lived those moments in such delight, the value is intrinsic. Small things become great by the touch of love and delight.

Some people turn into master chefs, others open a can of soup for dinner. But then maybe the master chef is a terrible dancer and the can-of-soup person dances magically. It doesn’t matter what you are passionate about — what matters is that you follow your passion, allowing your creativity to arise from that. Every child is born creative. Children are so in the moment, so in touch with their innate joy, and spending time with children can greatly enhance your own creativity.

If you believe you are uncreative, you will become uncreative – because belief is not just belief, it opens and closes doors.  You were born creative,  but your creativity has been pushed aside if you have been filled with ideas to become ambitious, economical, and political.

When ambition enters, creativity disappears because ambition is in the future and creativity is in the present. Your creative sources have been plugged, blocked, destroyed and your whole energy has been forced into some activity that society thinks is going to pay. You have been taught to be money-oriented, power-oriented, and power is destructive, not creative. Creativity gives to the world, it does not destroy.

 

You have to take your life in your own hands, purify yourself of all conditionings, and suddenly you will see you are creative. You have to find what you can do, and what you cannot do. You have to grope in the dark. It is not clear-cut, you are not handed a template, but that is good, because in the very search, something grows in you. You are an opening, a potentiality for a thousand and one things and you have to choose, to feel your way. If you love your life, you will find your creativity. Dance because you love to dance, walk your dog because you love your dog and the fresh air, play tennis because you love to play tennis. Whatever you love to do, do it!  Never hide behind masks – be real, authentic, true to whatever you are doing, and you will find your creativity.

To be creative is to be close to the divine, but this closeness is available only if you pour your whole energy into your chosen activity. Discover your innermost joy and passion, and do it. Make what is invisible inside you visible, make your dream exist on the earth. Transform your potential into reality: this is the greatest joy there is. You attain real bliss when you have helped the divine shine through, when you have made the world a little more beautiful, when you have enhanced its joy. Live at your optimum. Don’t think of life as a burden, a duty to be fulfilled. Make it a dance; let it be a celebration.

You were a child once. As you pay attention to magical moments from your childhood, you help your creativity, passion, and joy grow. A new life energy runs through you. You become more receptive, more loving.

Here is a powerful technique to help unleash your creativity:

Four-Minute Meditation: Gather Moments of Joy

Step One

Remember one moment from your childhood, from joyful times, when you felt that life was magic, that just to be alive was ecstatic, that just to breathe was enough. You didn’t need anything to make you joyful. Gather this moment. Close your eyes and remember it.

 

 

 

Step Two

Now relive this moment. Become a child again. Run, sing, play. As you continue this practice, do it for a longer time, ten, twenty, or thirty minutes. If memories are triggered of times your passion for a particular activity was cut off, reinfuse that activity with passion NOW. Your life becomes revitalized with creativity and joy.

Creativity is the ability to see what other people can’t. How can you be creative when your sight is clouded by an overbusy mind?

Spending time doing nothing, relaxing, walking in nature, sitting on your porch, enjoying any kind of downtime that you can fit into your day: all these help you tune in to your creativity. Laughter and dancing help you to loosen up. Having fun, being playful, playing sports and games, singing and dancing, and whistling all enhance your creative process. Laughter breaks up the serious grip of the mind so that your natural talents shine through.

Creativity means allowing the new to happen. Be courageous! Put aside memory so the past does not interfere. Let the new penetrate you and thrill your heart.

You are a human being, the very culmination of this existence; you are conscious. You have come into this world with a specific destiny – you have something to fulfill, a message to be delivered, some work to be completed. You are not here accidentally: existence intends to do something through you.

Reproduced with permission from Pragito Dove www.discovermeditation.com

Taking Chances on a New Career

By Judi Moreo

People find jobs they are suited for when they are young. At least, they believe they find the right kind of job. But as they progress, many feel disillusioned with the career they chose, feeling it isn’t what they thought it would be.

They think about changing careers, but that often means starting over. That is a scary proposition, especially if they have been in a certain career for several years. It’s likely they have climbed the corporate ladder and are earning a pretty decent salary. Starting over is sure to require a cut in pay and that can adversely affect the life of the employee and his or her family.

Taking on a new career is not only about a cut in money, either. It also means starting over as far as the pecking order or seniority that was gained after many years in the original career. This too, can be a scary proposition. Another factor for career changers is that they are typically older. If people do decide to switch, they tend to do it in their forties or fifties. This means they have as little experience in the new career as someone just starting out and younger. That can be intimidating.

If you are considering a career change and you have thought about the scenarios above, you should know there are positives that you should consider when making your decision. The first is that money isn’t everything. Sometimes, getting out of a bad situation is enough to overcome the objection of less money. Besides, the internet makes it really easy to earn extra income, either by selling online or doing work for others. It is no longer necessary to work at a physical location when trying to earn extra money.

The second factor regarding lack of experience in the new career is the fact that it will be new for you. This can be exciting as well as scary. Think back to when you first started in your original career. Any new achievement made you feel like you could rule the world.

The third factor where you have no seniority, remind yourself that you do have work and life experience that can still be brought to the table. If you have any management experience, it can easily carry over.  And you will know how to handle adverse situations better than your younger colleagues.

Staying in a career that you have grown tired of can make you bitter and take years off your life. If you have thought about taking a chance in starting a new career, remember others have done it and have made it work.

Judi Moreo is one of the most recognized personal growth trainers and coaches in the world. She is the author of 24 books including 2 international bestsellers, “You Are More Than Enough” and “Ignite the Spark.”  As a personal achievement coach, hypnotherapist, and NLP practitioner, Judi will help you discover that you really are More Than Enough to achieve the success you desire.  She has informed, inspired, challenged, motivated and entertained audiences in twenty-nine countries around the globe.   Judi has received many awards including the Woman of Achievement, Entrepreneur; the Nevada Business Person of the Year; has been inducted into the Business Hall of Fame; and in 2020, received a HerStory Award from the Women’s Federation for World Peace. To contact Judi Moreo, judi@judimoreo.com or 702-283-4567.